ILLNESS AS TEACHER

There is a theory going around  that people have succumbed to more mental distress and physical illness this winter than is typical.  I know that's true for me.   The idea is that with the upheaval in our political situation throughout last year's presidential campaign and especially since the election, we

are off balance.  So many conflicts, controversies, and policy changes are coming at us so fast and furiously, we are thrown into  a state of "fight or flight" emotionally, which impacts us physically  -- we feel the stress response.  For some of us concerned about the changes happening politically, we have been paying very close attention and doing what we can to raise our voices.  That can be empowering, for our democracy depends on the voice of the people to keep it strong, but it is also exhausting.

I've been sick more this winter than in recent memory.  I'm generally a very healthy person able to fend off the "bugs" that many people get.  Not this year.  Is it political stress?  Maybe.  But whatever it is, it frustrates me.  Apart from feeling physically awful, I get anxious about physical ailments, assuming they could lead to more serious diagnoses on one hand, or just that I am sidelined and my busy and productive life is interrupted on the other.  This week I had several fun outings and productive projects on tap and for two days I've barely left my sofa.  Bummer!

So....today I stopped fighting and just let myself sink into this situation.  As I sipped my tea and watched the birds at the feeder outside the window, I heard Karen's voice from class last week repeating the mantra of "self compassion".  "Be kind to yourself," "Be gentle in your judgements."  So I took some deep breaths, closed my eyes and surrendered to the reality of the NOW.  The reality of being exhausted, unwell, and "stuck" at home with an illness that I did not want.

Then I wondered, how is this illness serving me?

I'm slowing down.  I'm resting.  I'm taking a break from my busy schedule, from my "to do" list of projects and social life, from politics.  I don't have any energy right now to "resist".  All I can do is accept.

I cannot go to Yoga practice, but I'm practicing nonetheless.  Yoga is about letting go of thoughts (no I won't die of this); accepting the moment (I'm not feeling well; it will pass); being aware of our surroundings (so grateful for my warm cozy home, comfy sofa, a glimpse of the sun this afternoon.)  And I'm remembering:  Be compassionate with myself.  Be gentle with my judgements.

I'll be better soon and back on the mat with a renewed sense of acceptance, even of those things we don't want but must manage in every moment.  The Power of Now is the Power of Yoga.  Breathe.  Embrace.  Let it go.

Namaste...donnajurene

Photo credit: Pixabay