MINDFULNESS BASED STRESS REDUCTION -- PART 3

We have had a spectacular Fall.  The days have been mostly warm and sunny; the nights cool and clear.  The Fall colors have been brilliant and have lasted all month since no torrential downpours or sustained winds have knocked them from their branches.  Everyone is eager to be outside, drinking it all in before the inevitable winter gloom comes upon us.

That's why it was really, really hard to head to a day-long meditation retreat last Saturday as part of this mindfulness course I am taking.  All the live-long, sunny, brilliant blue sky, red-orange-gold day I spent inside a hospital conference room not talking to anyone and, most of the time, with my eyes closed.  I had thought of a million reasons not to go.
But I went.

This day-long retreat is meant to be a total immersion into mindfulness meditation, a "sampler" of meditation practices we may find useful in our daily lives.  We've explored some of them in class, but this was a chance to dive deep.

We arrived at 9:00 a.m. to settle in and get instruction from our teacher.  Then we went into silence.

At 9:30 we had our first sitting meditation session: Awareness of Breath.  The idea is to just breathe.  Don't do anything special, just be aware of the breath going in and out of the nose; the belly and chest rising and falling in rhythm.  Thoughts come, acknowledge that, and let them pass on without attaching to them.  Sounds easy, huh?  Try it.  Especially try it when the large group in some sort of training session is on the other side of the room divider talking, laughing, and applauding.  Meditation challenge.

At 10:00 we stood for our first Walking Meditation session of the day.  The room was large enough for all of us to line up on each side of the room and and find a "lane" to walk to the other side, passing classmates along the way.  Again, nothing needed but to pay attention. Walk at any pace, but be aware of body, how the foot feels on the carpet, legs and arms moving in tandem,  and breath.  Don't focus on thoughts, just body moving along your lane.  I liked it and found it calming.

At 10:30 it was time for some easy yoga and a body-scan.  We spread out our mats and followed the instructions of our teacher as he led us through a very gentle asana practice, then we settled into a savasana posture to do a full body-scan practice.  Some fell asleep, but not me.  I did notice I continue to have a hard time with this practice, feeling uncomfortable on my back even though I brought lots of props and blankets, and that I get very impatient and antsy.  Interesting to note.  No judgement.

At 11:00 it was time to sit again for a Listening Practice.  Just close eyes, and hear sounds.  Try not to identify or explain to resist or tell a story, just notice "sound" and move on.  "Sound" was mostly that other group continuing to distract me.  HaHa  I need more practice.

At 11:30 we walked again.  Same thing.

At noon we had a lunch break...Mindful Eating.  Everyone found a quiet place to eat their sack lunch. Some stayed in the room, others retreated to the large foyer where there were big windows and a few tables, and some rebels defied the instructions and went outside.  That was me.  I just HAD to have some fresh air and sunshine.  A couple others did too.  I ate my crackers, cheese, and fruit with the sun on my face, the breeze in my hair, the colors of the trees dancing before my eyes, and watched as a crew re-striped the parking lot in the back of the hospital.  I loved the quiet and focus of eating with intention.

Back inside at 12:45 we sat for and Open Awareness meditation.  This one really resonated with me.  The idea is to be fully aware of everything going on -- being in touch with all senses and thoughts and to learn, by this paying attention, more about ourselves -- how our minds and bodies have certain habits and patterns.  We were to notice, note, and move on...but with some awareness of Self and how we might be causing our own distress at times.  I noted that I am always planning something.  And not just "I have to stop at the store on the way home.." but planning imaginary gatherings, or creating a book, or writing any number of things I have ideas for...actual sentences of some future writing project started to flit though my mind.  No wonder I often feel I don't accomplish enough; my brain is creating things at such a pace, I could never keep up.

At 1:15 we walked again.  Back and forth.  I noticed that movement meditation, either walking or yoga, really calms my mind.  I don't think as much when I'm moving; not so caught by the planning mind.

At 1:45 we did a Lovingkindness Meditation.  This is when you send out loving thoughts of well-being to someone you love; then to someone you know a little, but not well; and in advanced practices, to someone with whom you have a lot of conflict or difficulty. Finally you sending lovingkindness to yourself.  I like this practice, but sometime it's really hard to send love to someone who is your nemesis.  Advanced, indeed.

At 2:15  we did a bit of standing yoga; again very gentle, and mostly Mountain Pose and bending left and right.

At 2:30 we did a Self-Compassion meditation, similar to Lovingkindness but totally self-directed.  It felt very nurturing.  One suggestion to was to visualize ourselves as children...it was powerful to send love to our little selves.

At 3:00 we finally were able to speak again...and shared in pairs and then with the group our experience of the day.  Everyone felt it was positive; many gained new insights and had profound experiences.

The retreat ended at 4:00.  I came away with new learning about how body movement can be a focused meditation for me.  I discovered that my planning brain keeps me feeling stressed at times over the fantasies of all I want and should to do, but don't have the time or energy to accomplish in real life.   I loved the sense of community, even though we were in silence together -- sort of an introvert's dream, really.

All in all, I'm glad I went.  I only wish it had been a rainy day...

Namaste,  donnajurene

MINDFULNESS BASED STRESS REDUCTION -- PART 2.

The mind-body connection is perhaps never more apparent than when we are in moments of stress.

Our bodies respond immediately to what feels like a threat -- which can be a real one, like a snarling dog running in your direction, or can be only the thought of a threat...the "what if's" we torment ourselves with in spiraling fantasies of death and disaster.  A car cuts you off and even though there was no danger of an accident, there could have been so the response is often fear and/or anger and a flood of stress hormones.

Whether real or imagined...what is the body response?  Same.  Fight, flight, or freeze happens.  Heart rate increases, blood pressure rises, muscles contract, hunger abates -- every bodily function starts to focus on survival and hormones are released on massive quantities to enable us to do what must be done to live another day.

Actually physical threats are thankfully rare for those of us in healthy relationships and in a relatively peaceful environments at home and in our communities.   But our minds are constantly scanning for danger anyway and for some this creates many, many moments of anxiety and stress as we imagine all that could go awry.  Our bodies begin to live in a physiological state similar to the mean dog attack response.

In the 4th & 5th MBSR classes we focus on stress and how we react and respond to it.  Life is stressful.  We can make it more so, often, by how we respond to every day stressors.  But we can learn to identify the actual events that stress us, the real emotions attached to those events, and how we can take a step back, breathe through the real emotion, and find a new response to the situation that does not contribute to the stress spiral.

A technique called RAIN is helpful.  You feel stressed over something;  you then

R:  Recognize what is happening:  Damn! That guy just cut me off!  I could have rear-ended him! What a jerk!  (You are angry because you've decided the guy is a jerk.  Also you are afraid because you might have been injured in an accident.  NOTE the stories you are telling yourself about the character of the person in the other car and the "what if" that might have happened...but didn't).

A:  Allow and accept what is, is.  (Whoa.  This is happening right now!  I got cut off and I'm feeling scared and angry.  I understand why I'm feeling these things.  I have compassion for myself in this situation; it really was scary and I'm a nervous driver anyway.)

I:  Investigate Inner Experience by recognizing the cascade of emotions and then calling upon mindfulness training to step back and breathe.  (Whew.  Taking deep breaths; feeling my tight shoulder muscles and consciously relaxing them; feeling my tight grip on the wheel and loosening it. Still a little nervous, but calmer; everything seems to be OK.  Traffic is moving and I'm fine...)

N:  Non-identification can be the response to the situation by recognizing that anger and fear are emotions that arose, but don't have to rule us in this situation.  The guy did a careless thing, perhaps, but isn't necessarily a jerk, so anger is a choice.  An accident might have happened, but didn't so fear is not an emotion that was appropriate...maybe gratitude is a better choice.  We had an experience; we didn't become the experience.  (Interesting; that guy made a careless decision to cut in, or maybe he just didn't see me.  I have been distracted before too.  Maybe he is dealing with some difficult stuff.  I'm grateful there was no accident.  -- End of story!)

This has helped me so much in my quest to overcome the constant flow of "story" in my head, the motives I assign to people, the fears and fantasies of worst case scenarios.

Mindfulness helps us be in the moment of what is, helps us find compassion for ourselves and others, allows us to live with open hearts and open minds to every unfolding moment.  And we don't have to be stressed all the time!

Let it RAIN!

Namaste,   donnajurene

MINDFULNESS BASED STRESS REDUCTION, PART 1

Accentuate the positive, they say.  Did that last week.  This week I'm focusing on the negative.

I'm three sessions (of eight, plus a day-long retreat) into a Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction course being offered at the medical facility in my town.  Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) is the brainchild of Jon Kabat-Zinn who founded the Stress Reduction Clinic at the University of Massachusetts Medical School after studying Buddhism with noted teachers such as Thich Nhat Hanh.  He eventually honed his work to create an 8-week standardized series called Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction, largely uncoupling the method from Buddhism, instead emphasizing the scientific aspects of the practice.  His course, marrying meditation with Hatha Yoga, has spread worldwide and seeks to help those suffering from stress, anxiety, pain, and illness.  He teaches "moment to moment awareness".   He's also written books on the topic; the most read being:  Wherever You Go, There You Are, and, Full Catastrophe Living.

I've always wanted to take an MBSR course, but never was one offered near where I live.  I wasn't into commuting long distance to go once a week, although in times of battling my Twin Demons: Anxiety and Depression, I've been very tempted to just do it.  So, I was thrilled to find the course offered a 10 minute drive from my front door.

The first session was an orientation and introduction to meditation using the "Body Scan" technique.  Yoga practitioners would find it a familiar practice, lying in savasana and focusing on discrete body parts, as in practicing Yoga Nidra, or "yoga sleep".  The idea, of course is not to go sleep but to find awareness in each body area and to also find relaxation in quieting the mind while concentrating on the sensations in your big toe, for example.

Our homework was to do a guided visualization 30 minute Body Scan (accessed through Mindfulness Northwest website, or the Insight Timer app.) six days a week.

The second class focused on Perception.  The idea was to separate the fact of what we experience from the story we tell ourselves about it.  Our response to life's ups and downs is often far more dramatic than it needs to be.  Could we be more objective about the events that arise?  Even positive ones?

Our homework was to continue the Body Scan, as well as making note once each day of something positive and to be aware of our thoughts, emotions, and body response to the positive event.

This week we are to continue awareness of the waves of "good" and "bad" that arise in life, but to focus primarily on our responses to the negative or unpleasant events.  Can we name it, and be aware of our physical, emotional, and intellectual responses to it?  We've also added a 30 minute sitting meditation, following the breath or a mantra, as well as a 30 minute very gentle yoga practice.

There are 20 people in the class, most total novices to meditation and yoga.  I have some quibbles with the fact that not enough attention is being paid to having precise instruction and good props for the asana poses and that the facilitator often rushes us from a deep meditation on to the next thing, but that's just cuz I think I know better.   I don't want to be the class critic!

So, I'm going with the flow and finding that my daily awareness is increasing and I am becoming more mindful and more relaxed about some life events that have caused anxiety for me in the past.  I'm able to be a tad more objective and quiet the little voices that want to lead me to worry.  Progress!

I'll keep you posted as the course goes on.

Namaste,  donnajurene