Friday, April 20, 2018

BAD RESORT YOGA


Why is resort yoga so frustrating?

I'm on vacation and tried the yoga offering here at the resort.  Again.  I've written blog posts in the past about my resort yoga experiences.  (Find them in the blog post index under headings:  In and Out of the Studio and Wardrobe)   I keep trying, but geez....

I met the yoga group at the appointed hour at the fitness center, chose a beat up, frayed, sandy mat from the cart where they were stored, wondering how often they are cleaned.   We followed the instructor through the gardens to the beach, like little chicks following the mother hen.  We unfurled our mats under a shade tree and began.

With no preliminaries, she had us immediately stand in Mountain Pose and then rise up on tiptoes for "balancing pose"....and we were off on what she announced would be a gentle class.  It was, for the most part, but a bit disjointed and weirdly constructed as one move didn't necessarily flow into the next.  Random Yoga.  Also, she had this auto-pilot thing she did (I've noticed this so many times with resort yoga instructors),  where even with her eyes closed, or facing away from us, she'd say, "Good job!  Beautiful!"  HOW DID SHE KNOW?  She wasn't looking at us!  It sort of cracked me up.  We could have been writhing in pain or flipping her the bird and she'd say, "Good job!"

I have some suggestions:

First of all, we are all here from somewhere else, right?  How about taking the first 5 minutes of the class welcoming us?  Maybe go around and ask us to share our names and where we are from and if we have ever done yoga before or have any injuries or needs she should be aware of.  Seems that would help build a little community, and allow her to know how best to support our practice.  Makes sense to me.

Also, how about reminding us to breathe, to only do what we can and no more, to skip anything that hurts.  I always see at least one or two in the class at resort yoga grimacing or looking embarrassed by their inability to do the pose.  There are never adequate (or any) props.  Help us out a little!   (Of course there are always also a couple of Yoga Journal models effortlessly moving into each pose in proper alignment with their rockin' fit bodies mocking the rest of us.)

At one point she did give us an alternative option for a "resting pose" -- "Take either Child's Pose or Pigeon, your choice."  Hmmmm... OK.   I don't see those as equivalent resting poses, and I have zero hours of teacher training, so what do I know?  And this may be nitpicking, but she kept calling the Downward Dog pose, "Downward Doggie".  No.  Just no.

I know these instructors see an ever-changing parade of tourists and it all becomes "just a job" at some point.  I get that.  She was friendly enough, as they all are, but I get the strong impression they are most eager to finish the hour and move on to whatever else they'd rather be doing.

And yoga in public is weird too.  We are on the beach, with people walking by, oggling our Happy Baby pose wide spread legs in the air above prominent butts.  It felt a little exhibitionist actually.

When it was time for Savasana, we lay in silence, thinking the only sound we hear would be the waves crashing to shore, the gentle breeze in the palms above us....but no.  A woman on her cell phone stood about 10 feet away giving a verbal description of her surroundings to someone back home, including, "... and I'm watching some people doing Yoga on the beach, or something..."

Or something, indeed.  ©

Namaste, donnajurene

Photo Credit:  www.pixaby.com

Thursday, April 12, 2018

A FRIENDLY REMINDER TO THE PRESIDENT

I'm worried about our President.  I fear this job is taking a toll on him and he's only a little over a year into his contract.  I'm pretty sure he has ditched his Yoga practice.  I see all the signs...

First of all, at any age we need to stay strong and flexible to stay in good health, but it's even more important as we grow older.  And he is older. I don't know if his golf game is doing all it could for his physical suppleness.  A few Twists might loosen up his back and provide more range of motion for that golf swing.  He might also find a few Forward Folds would make setting his tee or picking up his ball less onerous.  (Or is that the caddy's job?  I  know little about golf and less about a caddy's job description.)  I note that he likes to ride in the golf cart too.  Maybe walking would be a good idea.  I read that his weight is one pound less than officially obese.  He might want to do a Thread the Needle on each side to help expand those hip joints.  He could also spend some time with the rollers to loosen the fascia and improve his walking gait.  Just a suggestion.

As we all know, Yoga isn't just about physical exercise; it also about peace of mind.  I think the President seems a little tense.  I've never heard him laugh.  He smiles occasionally, but it looks forced.  I get it; he has a lot on his mind.  But maybe a few "Laughing Yoga" classes would loosen him up and relax him a bit.   He tends to take himself rather seriously.

Yoga is ultimately about self-awareness and finding inner calm.  I bet if he stepped up his yoga and meditation practice, he'd be less apt to awaken at dawn after fitful sleep and find himself Tweeting provocative scattershot messages that he often has to revise in the light of day.  Sir, yes, people will disappoint, will misunderstand, will disagree, but name-calling is beneath the dignity of your office.  Take a deep breath in...hold...let it all slowly out.  See?  Better!

When we begin to accept ourselves in all our contradictory glory, to realize the folly of trying to always be in control, to give up judgements, and to embrace the wondrous diversity of this universe, we are better able to let go of Ego and find compassion for others.   We see in them the same fears, joys, challenges, and victories we find in ourselves.  We naturally want to reach out a helping hand, especially to those most vulnerable, and find collaborative solutions to seemingly intractable problems.  Best of all, we stop being afraid of what is "different", because isn't "different" merely a trick of perspective?  Once we deeply realize we are all one, any need to punish, exploit, or degrade vanishes.  Do unto others, basically.

So, anyway.  New York is chock-a-block full of yoga studios and meditation sangas.  I'm sure he has taken ample advantage of these opportunities in his NYC life.  I understand he's still getting settled in D.C. and learning on the job, since he showed up with no experience.  Been there, done that.  Not easy.  But it's time to get back at it!

As his Administration seems to have some degree of turnover, perhaps he will find he can accommodate a yoga instructor in the West Wing.  He could do his practice during morning "executive time", maybe slip in a few Partner Yoga sessions with Melania!  It's better than being a couch potato, noshing on cheeseburgers,  listening to the TV pundits, whose advice he'd be silly to take.  I'm sure he knows that.

I think I'll hop on Twitter and urge him to get back to his yoga and meditation practices.  I think we'd all feel better.  ©

Namaste,  donnajurene