INSTANT KARMA GONNA GET ME

I knew when I hit "post" after writing the previous blog post to this one that I felt a little queazy about it.  I am a nice person; I go way, way out of my way to ensure that I'm being thoughtful and considerate, even though imperfectly, I'm sure.  I'm only human; but I try.  But I've felt a bit uncomfortable about that post and how I critiqued a yoga instructor at the resort where I was vacationing.  I threw in some self-deprecating humor to temper my judgement and I really meant it when I said, I really know almost nothing about teaching a class by myself at this point in my training, so who am I to judge?  But judge I did.

Part of our homework this month in Yoga Teacher Training in the study of the Yoga Sutras is to delve more deeply into the Yamas and Niyamas.  These are the guides to living an ethical life and self reflection. The very first Yama is "ahimsa" or non-violence and compassion.

As I read, I felt myself growing more and more uncomfortable.  I'm about the furthest thing from "violent" you could find. I would never strike another person.  I will avoid, negotiate, and compromise my way through any conflicts with other people.  I also have a great deal of compassion.  I really and truly care about people.  Do I like everyone I meet?  Do I show up with casseroles every time someone has a crisis?  No, but neither do I not care about them, forget they are suffering, or turn away when asked for help.  Often I make notes of those who need extra caring and include them in my meditations.  They may never know, but I hope it helps on some energetic level.  At any rate, I think I'm pretty good at the non-violent and compassionate Yama.

Except.

In my reading I was reminded that "violence" can also be "meanness" and comes in the form of thoughts as well as deeds.  Harming can be as simple as making a negative judgement about someone.  In this age of social media, this can go so far as online bullying and lead to denigrating and name calling for some -- all the easier since people feel a sense of anonymity in making remarks about something someone has written online -- the writer hardly seems human.   Having only a part of (or none of!) a person's whole story can lead to making snap judgments, jokes, and assumptions that are far from true, far from accurate, far from non-harming -- indeed, far from compassionate.

I did that with the blog post.  It's fun to be funny, to point out absurdities, and to join in laughter that creates a bond with others in similar circumstances.  But is it fun to do that at another's expense?  Of course not.  I have no problem poking fun at myself, or teasing back and forth a friend or family member who understands and joins in, but writing about a virtual stranger and picking apart her job, her knowledge, her technique?  Not funny.  Not fair.  Not in keeping with an ethical life.

I could have said the instructor wasn't a good fit for me.  If asked why, I could state some examples, offering that she may come from a tradition I'm unfamiliar with, and that she may be just right for others.  End of story.  I didn't have to poke and gloat.

I guess this post is a bit of a mea culpa.  I hope we've all learned something here.  I know I have.

Namaste, donnajurene