JUST BREATHE

Usually at the beginning of each class the instructor asks students if there is anything they'd like to work on that day.  I'm usually silent; I can go with the flow.  But it does pay to speak up, because those who do sort of set the tone for the rest of the class as the instructor creates the experience based on what people want and need that day.  I'm amazed at how teachers can do that on the spot, but I guess that's why they are the teachers and I'm the student.

One recent Saturday the class started with just this request, "Anyone have anything they want to work on today?"  There were the usual "hips" and "shoulders" requests.  I was tucked in the back and thought to myself, "I just want to get through this class without falling apart or puking."  I'd had a rough, emotionally challenging morning and felt very sad, a little sick, and overall rather disoriented.  OK, I admit it...I might have a teeny, tiny anxiety disorder that rears up every now and again.   Then the guy off to the side of me said, "Breathing."  There were a few giggles.  Breathing?  You just breathe, don't you? What's to work on?

Oh, I saw Elizabeth's (the teacher) eyes light up!  I know this about her -- she LOVES pranayama (yogic breathing).  If you take her classes you know she ties every movement to the breath very intentionally.  So, yeah, breathing was going to be a focus.

We lay down on our mats and began to take slow, deep breaths.  As she guided us, Elizabeth began to explain how the breath not only reflects our physical and emotional state of being, but that it can also create a desired state of being by using the breath to regulate our autonomic nervous system.  I'd heard this before, but on that day I clung to her words like a lifeline.

She told us that breathing from the abdomen, using our diaphragm instead of shallow chest breathing, allows more air to flow more efficiently.  She told us that a longer inhale than exhale will create a condition of energy -- signaling us to "get going" if we are feeling lethargic.  On the other hand, a longer exhale than inhale will calm us down and allow anxiety to dissipate.  This is generally the state most of us seek, since our lives are already usually going fast enough and we walk around with "fight or flight" stress hormones coursing through our bodies.

As she guided us through these deep, slow breaths with long exhales, she began to add messages that were reassuring:  "You are in this moment, in this room, hearing only the normal sounds around you.  You are safe.  No one can hurt you here.  You can create a sense of calm and content with your breath.  You have the power to change how you feel...."

Oh what beautiful music to my ears!  I lay on that mat with tears steaming from my eyes and rolling back on my cheeks.  I had to reach up and wipe my face a few times.  I was so grateful for the reminder that coming to class is not about exercise.  It's about learning to move, to breathe, to live in a calm, centered, grounded state of mind even when the world around us seems to be spinning out of control.  Yoga reminds me of who I really am and touches my Divine Essence, with something as simple as a breath.

I know I write about crying in class quite a bit.  Maybe sometimes tears come easily because of the prayer I say before I step on the mat -- asking Ganesha to remove all obstacles to my practice; to take away competition, judgement, and Ego and to allow me to be open to the experience of the moment.  That Ganesha!  Job well done, I guess!  Om Gam Ganapataye Namaha. ©

Namaste,  donnajurene